Sick baby words.
i started laughing this morning
i think that’s how delirious i am
lying in a bed full of deliciously warm blankets,
nuzzled up against a ferociously hot toddler,
whose hair looks like Brad Pitt from the late nineties,
whose nose is red like cherry tomatoes dying in the yard,
and whose sweet little hands search my face for kisses and comfort.
when I prayed to God for humility
to be emptied of myself,
to learn selflessness, generosity, kindness, gentleness and patience,
this was not my vision.
wrap me up, tighter,
orange juice. orange juice too spicy
hold you, hold you, mama bed
dada hold you
and in the womb, tucked away and stretching out,
a smaller baby
doing exemplary gymnastics, at 2 and 4 and 6 am.
And, so I find, at the end of myself, there is laughter of the delirious kind.
To perfect all selfishness
and drive me to prayer.